Hi babe. Or reader. Or educated lurker.

I’m Amelia, a slightly unhinged, painfully self-aware Southern transplant from North Carolina with a PhD in bad relationships, a minor in mommy issues, and a full-ride scholarship in being accused of snow bunny behavior (plot twist: I just like who likes me). I moved to Los Angeles not for a man, not for the fame—but because deep down, I know I’m a damn store. Not a star. A store. Open 24/7, full of emotional baggage, hot takes, and the occasional sale on serotonin. I also study at USC, which you may know as the University of Spoiled Children.

I'm the kind of girl who'll be passionately dissecting the presidential debates one minute, then crying over a niche Wikipedia article about medieval nuns the next—because yes, I love to learn, love the news, and probably have undiagnosed ADHD (but my attention span is sexy, so who cares?). I live for chaos, crave a good think piece, and believe every rant deserves a lipstick-stained glass of wine.

My girlfriends are my church, brunch is our altar, and the patriarchy? We piss on it for fun. Men? I roast them for sport but will still text one back if he uses a semicolon correctly or is Persian (don’t ask.). This blog is my love letter to unpredictability: a hot, messy, joyful space where I say everything I actually think and write the way people actually talk—fast, sharp, a little tipsy, and always wearing metaphorical heels.

Welcome to the blog. It's giving unfiltered. It's giving unhinged. It's giving... Pulitzer with a side of petty. And it will give you everything every Wednesday and Friday.